The Set of 400: #195 – My Favorite Alexanderplatz Exposition

Today! Because we don’t have a choice –

The Bourne Supremacy (2004)

Directed by Paul Greengrass

Starring Matt Damon (x3), Joan Allen (x3), Franka Potente, Brian Cox (x3), Julia Stiles, Karl Urban, Marton Csokas, Gabriel Mann, Tom Gallop, Michelle Monaghan

Just so you’re prepared – this is my least favorite of the Bourne trilogy, and even this one cracked the 200. The most recent Damon outing – Jason Bourne, I want to say? – wasn’t eligible, and wasn’t anything special, and that random Jeremy Renner movie was fine, but the first three – man, those are exciting, highly interchangeable films.

Like the Mission: Impossibles, these all take place in random, similar looking foreign cities, which you get to see whip by out the windows of speeding cars. Bourne will get involved in some conspiratorial bullshit in a frowsy apartment or abandoned train station, but then it’s right back to running. The first movie is an all-out chase, as they are coming for Bourne hard, the third movie is when he finally manages to piece the whole puzzle together, leaving the middle chapter – which is a straight revenge film, albeit also chocked full of chases, and an ending that gives some closure, but obviously benefits from the existence of a third film. Second films are hard, you guys.

With the obvious exception of the Breakin‘ franchise

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The Set of 400: #196 – My Favorite Faceless Villain

Today! Because for a tough guy you do a lot of pansy things –

Dick Tracy (1990)

Directed by Warren Beatty

Starring Warren Beatty, Al Pacino, Madonna (x2), Glenne Headly (x2), Charlie Korsmo, Dustin Hoffman (x3), Paul Sorvino (x2), Mandy Patinkin (x2), Seymour Cassel (x2), Charles Durning, William Forsythe, James Tolkan (x2), James Caan (x2), Michael J. Pollard (x3), Kathy Bates (x3), Dick Van Dyke, Ed O’Ross, R.G. Armstrong, Catherine O’Hara (x2), John Schuck (x2), Charles Fleischer (x4), Henry Silva, James Keane, Frank Campanella, Allan Garfield, Colm Meaney (x2), Bert Remsen (x2), Estelle Parsons

Look, we all wanted Dick Tracy to be the second coming of Batman in the summer of 1990, and no one more than Warren Beatty. They were using these hyper-stylized, primary color posters and design schemes, and they packed the film with movie stars from the smallest bit roles to the leads. And so what if the movie doesn’t 100% work – there is so much obvious effort in every inch of this film that you can’t help but be impressed as hell.

It’s a film exploding with color, and bullets

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The Set of 400: #197 – My Favorite Runaway Cat

Today! Because I don’t see a lot of money here –

Inside Llewyn Davis (2013)

Directed by Joel Coen and Ethan Coen (x2)

Starring Oscar Isaac, Carey Mulligan, John Goodman (x3), Garrett Hedlund, F. Murray Abraham (x2), Justin Timberlake, Adam Driver, Ethan Phillips, Robin Bartlett, Max Casella, Stark Sands, Jeanine Serralles

I debated when starting this list whether to include a cut-off at all, but once I landed on needing space to fairly evaluate these movies against each other, I had to resolve where the line would get drawn. In retrospect, maybe four years was too little (figure, all this was compiled in the summer of 2018, so I placed the eligibility date at January 1st, 2014). Thus only four 2013 movies made this list, and we’ve already reached the last of them. And yeah, maybe 2013 wasn’t the world’s greatest year for films, but hell, 2012 has 13 movies and 2011 has 8.

But, knowing what I know about 2013, having been there and looked around quite a bit, I’m still fairly confident Inside Llewyn Davis would emerge as my favorite. I’m not saying ’13 was a bad year, it’s just not a lovable year – 12 Years a Slave, Her, Nebraska, Prisoners, The Great Gatsby, and American Hustle almost made the list – an admirable group of movies, but none fought their way on. Nope, it’s only #388 The Wolf of Wall Street, #390 Gravity, #265 Iron Man 3, and this. Thin going! Jeez, Iron Man 3 is my second favorite movie of 2013? That can’t be right.

Nonetheless!

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The Set of 400: #198 – My Favorite Plaid Light Show

Today! Because that’s the same combination I have on my luggage!

Spaceballs (1987)

Directed by Mel Brooks (x2)

Starring Bill Pullman (x2), Daphne Zuniga, John Candy (x6), Rick Moranis (x2), Mel Brooks (x2), George Wyner (x3), Dick Van Patten (x3), Joan Rivers, Michael Winslow, Jim J. Bullock (x2), Dom DeLuise (x4), John Hurt (x2), Leslie Bevis, Stephen Tobolowsky (x4), Jack Riley, Rudy De Luca, Rick Ducommun (x3)

No higher than the fourth best Mel Brooks movie (no higher, I tell you!), Spaceballs is the one that landed squarely on my generation, and functioned as a decent balm for the end of the Star Wars trilogy. I doubt that was the intention – was Young Frankenstein supposed to be the missing eleventh Mary Shelley adaptation that never was? – but when I was a kid, I was starved for more Jedis and Wookies and droids, plus I liked comedy, so Spaceballs fit nicely. Realize, I was like three and a half when Return of the Jedi came out, so I don’t remember a world before that – new Star Wars movies seemed like an impossible dream, even by the time I was eight, so what if a couple of ex-SCTVers and the governor from Blazing Saddles were in it – this was essentially another, albeit twisted, chapter.

It takes things in an arguably better direction than Attack of the Clones, anyway

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The Set of 400: #199 – My Favorite Niagara Falls Excursion

Today! Because these humans are beginning to bore me –

Superman II (1980)

Directed by Richard Lester (and Richard Donner (x3), somewhat)

Starring Christopher Reeve (x2), Margot Kidder (x2), Gene Hackman (x2), Terence Stamp (x4), Sarah Douglas (x2), Jack O’Halloran (x2), Jackie Cooper (x2), Ned Beatty (x3), Valerie Perrine (x3), Susannah York (x3), Clifton James (x2), E.G. Marshall (x2), Marc McClure (x3), John Ratzenberger (x3), Shane Rimmer, Pepper Martin

A good case for being the only solid movie starring Big Blue ever made, Superman II‘s production history is as entertaining as the movie itself – what with the crazy plan to film it concurrently with the original film in 1977 and ’78, the scrapping of this plan partway through, the firing of original film director Donner, a bunch of the actors quitting – including Hackman, requiring massive rewrites and doubling, the death of some key crew members, the lawsuits by Marlon Brando and against Christopher Reeve, and the fact that despite all this turbulence – and replacement director Lester’s decidedly different spin on the sequel – virtually everyone you talk to agrees that this movie is far superior to the original.

You know what? I’m good.

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The Set of 400: #200 – My Favorite Swiped Candlesticks

Today! Because I will take you in the end! You know I will!

Les Miserables (1935)

Directed by Richard Boleslawski

Starring Fredric March, Charles Laughton (x2), Cedric Hardwicke, Florence Eldridge, Rochelle Hudson, John Beal, Frances Drake, Jessie Ralph (x2), Ferdinand Gottschalk, Jane Kerr, John Carradine (x2)

Still the best film version of Victor Hugo’s novel (even if it lops off the final quarter of the story), 1935’s Les Miserables brings the 1,100 page novel in under two hours, and manages to cover pretty much the whole main plot. If you’re a huge fan of the book or the musical – and come on, who isn’t? – there is plenty glossed over and lost along the way, but if this story has always basically boiled down to Valjean v. Javert, this is the film version for you. Plus, no Russell Crowe singing!

Gah!

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The Set of 400: #201 – My Favorite Chicago St. Patrick’s Day Parade

Today! Because the guy did a Peter Pan right off of this dam right here –

The Fugitive (1993)

Directed by Andrew Davis (x2)

Starring Harrison Ford (x2), Tommy Lee Jones (x4), Joe Pantoliano (x3), Sela Ward, Julianne Moore (x2), Jeroen Krabbe, Andreas Katsulas, Ron Dean, Jane Lynch (x3), Neil Flynn (x3), Daniel Roebuck, L. Scott Caldwell, Tom Wood (x2), Richard Riehle

There is obviously no way they could’ve known while filming this movie that some fifteen years later, currently thirteen-year-old Joe – playing out the string in eighth grade in North Scranton – would pack up his meager half-double (also in North Scranton) and drive 700 miles to deposit said belongings in a one-bedroom apartment in Lincoln Park, Chicago, where he would quickly adopt all films set in the big town as virtual home movies, even ones made back when he was a thirteen-year-old, playing out the string in North Scranton. This is all about me, folks, and never more so now that we’ve officially reached the halfway point – post #200 counting down! [see bottom of page for actual halfway point] Plus, tomorrow is apparently Thanksgiving, if my future calendar reading is correct, so clearly we’ve all got a lot to be thankful for! Me getting this far, you for living to see half of my favorite movies from the years 1927 to 2013 get posts! Congratulations to us all!

But really, congratulations to me

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The Set of 400: #202 – My Favorite Imminent Wall Collapse

Today! Because we burned this tight-arsed city to the ground in 1814, and I’m all for doing it again, starting with you, you frat fuck –

In the Loop (2009)

Directed by Armando Iannucci

Starring Peter Capaldi, Tom Hollander, Mimi Kennedy, James Gandolfini, Gina McKee, Anna Chlumsky, David Rasche (x2), Steve Coogan, Zach Woods, Olivia Poulet, Chris Addison, James Smith, Paul Higgins

A brilliant comedy that functions oddly as both a TV show sequel and a different show’s pseudo-prequel, In the Loop comes from the genius of Armando Iannucci, whose place on future lists is assured – his 2018 comedy The Death of Stalin is the funniest movie of the last five years. And going back a ways, Iannucci is also the driving creative force (along with star Steve Coogan, obviously) behind two of my favorite British television shows – Knowing Me, Knowing You with Alan Partridge and its spin-off/sequel I’m Alan Partridge (plus the later film – Alan Partridge: Alpha Papa). I can’t speak to a lot of his other TV credits, as those shows never got themselves available in the states.

“A-ha!”

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The Set of 400: #203 – My Favorite Inter-Celluloidal Romance

Today! Because I don’t get hurt or bleed, hair doesn’t muss – it’s one of the advantages of being imaginary –

The Purple Rose of Cairo (1985)

Directed by Woody Allen (x4)

Starring Mia Farrow (x3), Jeff Daniels, Danny Aiello (x2), Edward Herrmann (x2), Deborah Rush (x2), Van Johnson, John Wood, Zoe Caldwell, Milo O’Shea (x2), Dianne Wiest, Glenne Headly, Peter McRobbie

While his early movies had a greater tendency toward the absurd and the extreme, Woody Allen has never really been a director of all-out fantasy. There are partial exceptions, sure – Sleeper, Midnight in Paris, Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex…, Zelig – but it is most pronounced with The Purple Rose of Cairo. Figure, Sleeper is a straight science-fiction comedy, Everything You Always Wanted… is a bag of vignettes, some fantastic, some just goofy, but Purple Rose of Cairo is this wholly unexpected, supernatural thing taking place in the real world – much like Midnight in Paris.

This was also the first comedy Woody made that he doesn’t appear in – and unlike his later comedies, there isn’t even a “Woody Allen character” in the bunch -maybe you could stretch it to say Mia Farrow’s Cecilia fits this bill, albeit just barely. Her depressed, 1930’s movie fan frequents the local theater, where one day – while showing the titular movie-in-the-movie (favorite sub genre!), star Tom Baxter (Jeff Daniels) just walks out of the screen and sweeps her off her feet. And as fun as the fish-out-of-water movie character wandering around the real world is, the reel world section of the film – where the movie inside the theater tries to figure out how to continue after one of the actors disappears – is almost better, and good for plenty of laughs. Continue reading

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The Set of 400: #204 – My Favorite Free Corn Dogs Promotion

Today! Because there’s a bear loose in the coliseum! There will be no refunds! Your refund will be escaping this deathtrap with your life!

Semi-Pro (2008)

Directed by Kent Alterman

Starring Will Ferrell (x3), Woody Harrelson (x5), Andre Benjamin, Maura Tierney (x2), Will Arnett, Andrew Daly, David Koechner, Rob Corddry (x3), Andy Richter, Matt Walsh (x5), DeRay Davis, Josh Braaten, Jay Phillips, Peter Cornell, Jackie Earle Haley (x3), Tim Meadows (x2), Patti LaBelle, Ian Roberts (x2), Ed Helms (x3), Jerry Minor, Jason Sudeikis, Kristen Wiig (x3)

The most underrated sports comedy in recent memory, Semi-Pro is basically a beat-for-beat basketball-based remake of #213 Slap Shot. I’ll admit that. Instead of the team on the verge of folding because of hometown financial distress, here it’s that the very real ABA is being acquired by the NBA, bringing the top four of its teams into the big league. Trying to fight their way into this select group is Jackie Moon’s Flint Tropics (the only fictional franchise in the movie), which needs to get their attendance number up to even compete, and that requires some gimmicks.

So, okay, is it the 70% knock-off of Slap Shot that bothers people? Because this is still a really funny movie. Sure, it does have the feeling of two different scripts slammed together into one movie – the wacky, Will Ferrell Jackie plot, along with Woody Harrelson’s over-the-hill former NBA player trying to get his old love life sorted out story. And they don’t mesh together terrible well, but neither is particularly bad. Plus it has that fun ’70s setting and a ton of great comedians filling out the cast – highlights including Will Arnett and Andrew Daly’s broadcast team of Lou Redwood and Dick Pepperfield, Matt Walsh’s ref and source of major abuse Father Pat, Jackie Earle Haley’s burnout winner of the halftime shooting contest Dukes, and Kristen Wiig as the bear handler. Continue reading

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The Set of 400: #205 – My Favorite Microwaved Spray Paint

Today! Because mistletoe can be deadly if you eat it –

Batman Returns (1992)

Directed by Tim Burton (x3)

Starring Michael Keaton (x3), Michelle Pfeiffer, Danny DeVito (x4), Christopher Walken, Michael Gough (x2), Michael Murphy (x4), Pat Hingle (x2), Vincent Schiavelli (x4), Andrew Bryniarski, Jan Hooks (x2), Steve Witting, Paul Reubens (x3), Cristi Conaway

A superhero outing aggressively not holding up, Batman Returns was basically my favorite movie when I was 12 years old. I’d been waiting three years for the next Bat-adventure, and where this manner of suspense might raise expectations far higher than a film could reach nowadays, back then it just functioned as a way to excuse a lot of their choices. We finally had another Keaton/Burton Bat-flick! And it had the Penguin! And Catwoman! And…Christopher Walken in a ridiculous wig!

And style-wise, it’s still a pretty cool movie. Between the Christmas setting, the weirder, twistier sets than the first movie, Michelle Pfeiffer’s super dramatic eye makeup, and a marked increase in the Tim Burton-ness of the design, it’s a sequel that takes off in bizarre other directions, while still maintaining the overall gloom and moodiness set in place by the original.

Maybe it’s not so much the make up as all the time spent on that hair!

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The Set of 400: #206 – My Favorite Political Savant

Today! Because life is a state of mind –

Being There (1979)

Directed by Hal Ashby (x2)

Starring Peter Sellers (x2), Shirley MacLaine, Melvyn Douglas, Jack Warden, Richard Dysart, Richard Basehart (x2), James Noble, Alice Hirson, Elya Baskin (x2), Ruth Attaway

Hal Ashby’s brilliant decade came to an end with Being There, a character-based comedy featuring an absolutely brilliant turn by Peter Sellers as the simple minded gardener Chance. Upon the death of his boss, he’s thrust out into society, which he only knows from television, and while there are some fish out of water moments, the point of the story is more the way he looks at life. Sure, it can be a little schmaltzy, but figure, he’s surrounded by monstrous politicians and people who don’t understand who he is from the second he’s out in the world, and yet he’s not immediately crushed by the unbearable weight of foreign circumstance. He just gets by, unaffected, even though society is almost designed to destroy such a person. Chance the Gardener – later, Chauncey Gardner – makes it work.

Shirley MacLaine is also magnificent in this movie

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The Set of 400: #207 – My Favorite Strenuous Objection

Today! Because you want me on that wall! You need me on that wall!

A Few Good Men (1992)

Directed by Rob Reiner (x2)

Starring Tom Cruise (x4), Demi Moore (x2), Jack Nicholson (x3), Kevin Pollak (x2), Kevin Bacon (x4), Kiefer Sutherland, J.T. Walsh (x4), Christopher Guest (x2), James Marshall, J.A. Preston, Xander Berkeley, Wolfgang Bodison, Cuba Gooding Jr., Noah Wyle, Joshua Malina, David Bowe

The 65th Academy Awards were the first that I really paid attention to – I had some movie-fan familiarity with prior ones, but this felt like the first year I made a point to see nominated movies, even in that limited, 1992, racing up Green Ridge Street to the Blockbuster in Dunmore, hoping copies were available, world we lived in. And as I’ve mentioned many times, 1992 is the most represented year on this list – this could certainly be part of the reason. Look at the wide smattering of films 12/13 year old Joe enjoyed enough to still remain in the consciousness now, 25+ years later – #262 The Crying Game, #389 Memoirs of an Invisible Man, #219 The Player, #242 Chaplin, #343 White Men Can’t Jump, and so on. And yes, there are still fully eight more movies to come!

Oh, the epochal shouting!

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The Set of 400: #208 – My Favorite Internet Troll Comeuppance

Today! Because Affleck was the bomb in Phantoms 

Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back (2001)

Directed by Kevin Smith (x2)

Starring Jason Mewes (x2), Kevin Smith (x2), Ben Affleck (x2), Jason Lee, Matt Damon (x2), Chris Rock (x3), Will Ferrell (x2), Shannon Elizabeth (x2), Eliza Dushku, Jon Stewart, Judd Nelson (x2), Mark Hamill, Carrie Fisher (x2), Jamie Kennedy (x2), Wes Craven, Gus Van Sant, Shannen Doherty, James Van Der Beek, Jason Biggs (x2), Jeff Anderson (x2), Brian O’Halloran (x2), Ali Larter, Jennifer Schwalbach Smith, George Carlin, Seann William Scott (x5), Tracy Morgan, Diedrich Bader, Joey Lauren Adams, Alanis Morissette, Morris Day and the Time, William B. Davis

Okay, if you are ready to jump down my throat at the inclusion of this film, take a gander at these two list facts: 1) This is the second and final Kevin Smith to make appearance, meaning 2) This is my favorite Kevin Smith movie. SHUT UP! I fully recognize that virtually all of his movies are better than this – Clerks, Mallrats, maybe Chasing Amy, maybe Dogma, Clerks II, Zach and Miri Make a Porno – and like most people I haven’t seen anything he’s made in the last ten years. But none of his movies are funnier than Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back. I don’t care what you say.

It’s funny, right?

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The Set of 400: #209 – My Favorite Heroin Stuffed Doll

Today! Because there was a murder around here last night, they found the body this morning. A lady from Scarsdale –

Wait Until Dark (1967)

Directed by Terence Young

Starring Audrey Hepburn, Alan Arkin (x3), Richard Crenna, Jack Weston, Efrem Zimbalist Jr. (x2), Julie Herrod, Samantha Jones

Apparently my favorite movie from 1967 (take that #263 Jungle Book and #311 The Graduate!), Wait Until Dark was a tremendous play by Frederick Knott (that I secretly and not so secretly burned to stage, back in my theater days), turned into a very effective locked-in movie, featuring the best acting Audrey Hepburn would ever do. Many of her most famous roles largely required her to show up – not saying she wasn’t talented, but light comedies like Breakfast at Tiffany’s and Sabrina and Roman Holiday aren’t exactly showcases for towering talent. Or maybe I just give more credit to drama/thriller acting – which probably isn’t fair. You know what, forget what I said. Audrey Hepburn is fine.

Hell, I couldn’t pull off this look

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