Today! Because you’ve fooled them, haven’t you, Michael? But not me –
Directed by John Carpenter
Starring Jamie Lee Curtis, Donald Pleasence, P.J. Soles (x2), Nancy Kyes, Charles Cyphers, Kyle Richards, Brian Andrews, Nick Castle, Tony Moran
As few films on this list can be classified as horror, Halloween holds the very real distinction of being the only true slasher movie. The handful of others are usually crossing more into fantasy/demons type areas (or are films masquerading as mainstream crime/drama, but with serious horror elements), but in the Stabby Dude horror sub-category, this is all you’ll find. I think having a real love and appreciation for horror movies requires a specific type of movie fan, so a list of, say, their 400 favorite movies would naturally include tons of these. I genuinely enjoy lousy movies, from poorly executed studio films to under budgeted amateur trash, but those movies aren’t going to ever get classified as a “favorite” of mine, and the vast majority of this sort of horror falls into that area. Tommy Wiseau’s The Room (not a horror film) did come close, though.
Lisa did not literally tear him apart
Someone is illegally parked and owes me a shot
It all began way, way back in the early a.m. of October the 31st, with boys and girls still safe in their beds, dreaming of all the glorious face paint required for their respective Mikhail Gorbachev and Mystique costumes. Pumpkins were carved, candy dishes with stocked, and the tramps had hunted down their sexy meter maid outfits. It was Halloween as usual.
Except for me. You see, in years past, I found only too late that I wished I had a mountain of facial hair to play with if needed for a costume. You can’t decide to be a convincing Magnum P.I. if you start the growing on United Nations Day (hint: October 24th). You’ve got to be shunning the Norelco at least from German Unity Day (hint: October 3rd)! So, I abandoned all razoring, shelved the Old Spice and let the hirsuteness free.
Total beard growth, just in case. I mean, why not? The options are awesome with the woolly cheek blanket stretching ear-to-ear. Do I go as the greatest drunk president in history, Ulysses S. Grant? Tap into my inner poet as Alan Ginsberg? Roll out the Hagrid?! As of Tuesday, I was still very excited at the prospects. Continue reading